so that's... difficult. a couple months ago, I got a DM from somebody who was excited to share with me something they saw and thought of me and I did not have it in me to tell them that said thing was so extremely deeply associated with somebody from my past who I have a traumatic experience with that I basically just could not respond. I did not manage to be able to talk to them until a couple days later they sent another DM that pushed the discussion of that out of view

all this to say I may not have amazing advice here. there's a lot of things that make me uncomfortable because of history/baggage/outright interpersonal trauma and a lot of the time I just sort of grin and bear it and maybe do my best to mute the server for a period of time until I can be sure they're no longer talking about it. in rare cases, I'm able to get ahead of the situation and bring up that it's a problem I have before people talk about it

but otherwise, I just sort of... try and deal, you know? and that's not healthy. I know it's not healthy because there's been times where it's happened enough that I can't handle it anymore and I lash out. not in a way where I'm like "how dare you talk about this, don't you know [THING THEY COULD NOT POSSIBLY KNOW]?" but I get snippy. I try and take over and steer the conversation to something out in a way that is clearly rude and almost dismissive

I guess what I'm saying is that I don't know. I handle this really poorly myself and don't really have any practical advice