i decided to close the acc, because i want to keep liking jn! running that acc has run my love for jn, n0min, and writing to the ground... it's not even about the hate anymore because it's something i learned to tolerate over the years, but because i don't really have the support anymore 🥹 i've been writing for so long that ppl just grew used to my presence so i hardly get any feedbacks on my works. i don't write as fast as i used to, so ppl would get upset and spam my inbox with things like "if you have time to scroll twt, then you have time to update" and that's all i ever woke up to :^) i don't mind ppl asking for updates, but i would get so anxious waking up, rt one thing, and have my inbox flooded with "update?" with no follow up lol. in the end, it just felt like i was a writing machine... i hated what i was putting out, but the audience loved it. if i liked what i was putting out, ppl absolutely hated it. in the end, there was no middle and i was just so miserable every day :^)

now that i've been away for five months, i started to really enjoy dream's music again! i also started watching jn fancams again, and it seems like i still like him a lot! i was just burned out so i thought the feelings were gone, but watching him, especially his mfal fancams, still makes me as happy as he did back in 2018 eueuuee...

i still have some things to take care of on that acc, so i can't close it yet. for one, i need to finish up pinkno because a lot of my friends are fans of that story, and i would feel bad leaving it unfinished. once that's wrapped up, i'll formally bid goodbye!

btw im curious, how did you end up finding me on this acc ?! LOL