waaah thanku so much anon!!! 🥹🩷 sorry for the late reply, i think im currently going through the motions of post-writing crash out. after 6 months of drafting, editing, rewriting, scrapping, crying etc. i finally submitted the piece… so. now what? LOL but just to manage ppl’s expectations: it’s a wip, and may stay a wip for a very long time.

the past 6 months only account for the writing part of the process—it took almost 5 years of conceptualization and maladaptively daydreaming about this story before i found it in me to write it!! yes, since 2021!!! pandemic times!!!!

though, actually, those 5 years weren’t exclusively intangible. this piece has been through many—and i mean MANY—incarnated drafts, rip to those that were scrapped ❤️‍🩹 but as time went on, those incarnations got tighter and tighter all until i felt that profound spark: yes, This is the right perspective + approach to express the tale, This will do it justice. shoutout to the vkook fest mods for the divine timing of the fest whoop whoop ✨

so yes. bc i hate outlines, my pantsing writer’s ass is to credit/blame for what the story has become. and ask my betas, they know very well that this “final” incarnation of the story went through countless micro-deaths and rebirths from within. that kill-your-darlings cycle, i suppose, is the foundation of my process as a writer, and it hurts to do that again and again 😭im not exaggerating when i say that my dump has nearly 100k words’ worth of raw ideas and fully fleshed-out scenes that will never see the light of day (unless some readers want them as "bloopers" :p). it doesn’t help that i’m a slow writer—it’d take 1 full day for me to write 800-1000 words, only for me to dump them all when i realize it’s not quite the direction/tone/voice i want the story to take.

this is torture, but this is also the craft. big sigh!!!

as for my favorite part, it was probably the smut. not just for its indulgence, but the sheer art of how i cannot simply write it in one go. those scenes somehow build themselves, yet at the same time go through waves and waves of edits and rewrites and fine-tuning to achieve that palpable, almost-musical cadence and rhythm in the words. ngl it got super exhausting tho, my brain was fried looking up synonyms for the word moan + cross-referencing other masterful smut scenes, studying their structures to create my own 😵‍💫

anyway, i’m really looking forward to when it gets published ^^ thank u again anon for the question, much love 💐💞