i write! ficsional on twt and ao3. :)
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Anonymous · 2d
congratulations on finishing your draft!!! what's your favorite part about the writing process and or care to share what your process is? :)
waaah thanku so much anon!!! 🥹🩷 sorry for the late reply, i think im currently going through the motions of post-writing crash out. after 6 months of drafting, editing, rewriting, scrapping, crying etc. i finally submitted the piece… so. now what? LOL but just to manage ppl’s expectations: it’s a wip, and may stay a wip for a very long time.
the past 6 months only account for the writing part of the process—it took almost 5 years of conceptualization and maladaptively daydreaming about this story before i found it in me to write it!! yes, since 2021!!! pandemic times!!!!
though, actually, those 5 years weren’t exclusively intangible. this piece has been through many—and i mean MANY—incarnated drafts, rip to those that were scrapped ❤️🩹 but as time went on, those incarnations got tighter and tighter all until i felt that profound spark: yes, This is the right perspective + approach to express the tale, This will do it justice. shoutout to the vkook fest mods for the divine timing of the fest whoop whoop ✨
so yes. bc i hate outlines, my pantsing writer’s ass is to credit/blame for what the story has become. and ask my betas, they know very well that this “final” incarnation of the story went through countless micro-deaths and rebirths from within. that kill-your-darlings cycle, i suppose, is the foundation of my process as a writer, and it hurts to do that again and again 😭im not exaggerating when i say that my dump has nearly 100k words’ worth of raw ideas and fully fleshed-out scenes that will never see the light of day (unless some readers want them as "bloopers" :p). it doesn’t help that i’m a slow writer—it’d take 1 full day for me to write 800-1000 words, only for me to dump them all when i realize it’s not quite the direction/tone/voice i want the story to take.
this is torture, but this is also the craft. big sigh!!!
as for my favorite part, it was probably the smut. not just for its indulgence, but the sheer art of how i cannot simply write it in one go. those scenes somehow build themselves, yet at the same time go through waves and waves of edits and rewrites and fine-tuning to achieve that palpable, almost-musical cadence and rhythm in the words. ngl it got super exhausting tho, my brain was fried looking up synonyms for the word moan + cross-referencing other masterful smut scenes, studying their structures to create my own 😵💫
anyway, i’m really looking forward to when it gets published ^^ thank u again anon for the question, much love 💐💞
Anonymous · 18d
hi alex! i really, really, reallyyyyyyy lover your works. i love the way you write them. and i patiently await the day i will get to read more of it. i love alapaap, i love ordinary nights. i just love they you create your worlds, you give your characters their own voices. it's been a very long time since i started a fic and i realized that i could fall in love w the story. IT HAPPENED WITH ALAPAAP! i really really love your works. i want to interact more with you but my shy nature just doesnt allow it. TRUST ME i was so excited about your vkfest fic. it's no pressure if you cant write or finish it of course because i understand how it is to get to back something you had to abandon for a while. i just wanted to let you know that your efforts are appreciated. love you
waaaah thank you my dear 🫂🥺 as a slow writer, sometimes i can't help but feel a lil insecure bc, while i've been writing fics since 2020, i don't have much to show for at the moment other than ordinary nights and alapaap! (only one of them being a finished work). i'm so very grateful that you still see the value in what little i have to offer :`) and don't get me wrong, i have gone out of my way and wrote silly, sweet, & lighthearted aus here and there. but there's just a different catharsis and fulfillment i feel when crafting stories like alapaap!, ordinary nights, and [REDACTED]--they're heavier to work through, thus they need more time. (don't even get me started on the other wips i have in the backburner that share the same gravity!!!)
i thank u for ur presence and patience. much loveee 💐🩷
Anonymous · 1mo
i used to be active on twt ;-; interacted w all ur content, js saw u made ur acc pvt and my twt acc is new asw, i hope u open and accept ^^ we used to interact a lot back in 2021-22 hehe u even followed me back since i was ur no.1 fan :p i still am XD love ur works and opened twt w hopes to reread them.
AAAAA well i'm grateful you stuck around! i just cleared out my pending follow requests, hope i was able to accept you already. it's been pretty lonely on this acc, so im welcome to you reaching out through the replies or dm so we can catch up 💞 and given my inactivity, i sincerely appreciate your support. readers like you are what the bts fic community needs right now 🫂✨ much love 💐
Anonymous · 1mo
hi alex, have u been well?
hello love!!! sorry for the late reply, a lot has been going on. the real ups and downs of adulthood--mostly downs, but as imperative catalysts. right now, i'm powering my way through the final sections of my vk fest submission. finishing this on time is the one success i want to have this month, so i'm excited to share it with you 🩷💐
Anonymous · 4mo
are you okay? im a bit worried. hope all is good
hi woah didn't think anyone would message me here :_) if this is about my seizure-related tweets the other week, then yeah im good! i visited my doctor and am taking my meds again, though i am scheduled for an MRI and EEG soon. hoping the results show nothing remarkable (they usually are anyway). but other than that, all is deffo good as i have, once more, conquered my writer's block 🌟 ^^
thanks for checking in, anon. it means a lot 💐🩷
Anonymous · 5mo
can i ask why u disappeared for 2 (?) years? and what made you come back? :)
my disappearance was because of my last years of university xD after 2 years of online classes due to the pandemic, the next 2 years were onsite and thus far busier. i focused on a lot of academics and extracurriculars then. then after i graduated and got my first corporate job, i needed a creative purpose to get by... i stumbled on one of my ongoing fics on ao3 and found a few sweet comments left by readers. those comments are what made me dive back into creating little stories & worlds 🩷
Anonymous · 5mo
you're really a great writer technical-wise like you GOT IT. it's admirable can't wait to read more of your work
Anonymous · 6mo
Hii! I just wanted to send you lots of love ♡ Saw your wip Wednesday as well and here to let you know that it is okay to take a break if that's what you need rn. As someone who works in the creative industry, I know how hard it is to curate something you're 100% satisfied with, since we are our own worst critic. Perfectionism sometimes can lead to burn out, so please make sure to take time for yourself too!! May your trials end in full bloom xx
dani · 6mo
hello! i saw your unusual wip wednesday and i wanted to offer some sort of comfort, just wasn't sure how exactly to do it. here's my humble attempt: being an artist sometimes really sucks. you've got the need to self-express, but sometimes the means don't come so easily. i know from personal experience how freeing it is to create and how confining and frustrated one feels when there's a barrier between you and your goal to do something in your area of interest (in this case: writing). what has always helped in such moments is reading. giving time to the project, maybe seeing this barrier as something closer to a water wall, a fountain rather than bricks or cement. what is on the other side is visible, but you have to wet your hands to reach it, maybe to cleanse your mind, too. i don't know if you should keep pushing or give up, that's only on you, but i know that both are equally brave. i hope you rediscover language and your love for it. know that there are people who enjoy your writing and your stories (myself included). whatever you do, you have other people, other artists who support you. take care & stay safe 💗
thank u sm dani, always good to receive words like this from a fellow writer 🫂 and i totally hear you, reading is a way for us to fill our well again, cleanse things out. what's frustrating tho is when you want/need to write all the time that you can no longer earnestly carve out time/headspace for reading 😭 & i've taken a break from this ongoing wip for so long already (4 months approx), so i can't help feeling like im betraying someone by dropping it again : ( i'm taking another crack at it, one last time, and if it doesnt work, ill sigh all my guilt out and shut the door, this time for a lot longer. the silver lining of not having many readers--the only one i'll be betraying is myself ❤️🩹
(on the bright side, if it doesn't work and i drop it, i'll definitely have more room for reading then ahahah)