hey anon! i just wanna let you know that i also feel like this often, that words are hard and getting my vision into words is so tedious sometimes, and it can make it really hard to progress on things at the rate that i'd like. here's the routine i have for myself:

first of all, make sure you're sleeping well and you're nourished and hydrated, and that you've done some physical activity today even if it's just a walk outside!! taking care of yourself is super important, and if you're neglecting something it can also make it harder to get in the right mindset.

second of all, if you have those things covered, open your doc and write something. don't worry about if it's perfect, don't even worry about if it's good. this is what drafts are for!! just write something. this is important bcs it helps to build habit, which gives you a strong foundation for your hobby. just get in that doc and blurt things out!! you have nothing to lose!! you might come back to these drafts later and have a eureka moment and suddenly realize how you want to alter things to make them better, just blurting out your thoughts and allowing them to be messy and imperfect is great for finding your footing, this is a step by step process sometimes and that's fine!!

thirdly, take breaks. if you blurt out some thoughts and you're looking at them and thinking "this isnt what i want" that's fine, that's normal, whatever you do: don't delete that draft. keep it, you might feel differently about it later when you've had some time away from your wip. you never know when inspiration might strike, and you'll thank yourself for laying down some groundwork bcs it means you don't have to do as much to get your thoughts out next time. writing things down imperfectly and revisiting them later is kind of like leading yourself by the hand, ykwim?

finally (and i'm shaking you gently by the shoulders when i say this); fuck other people's expectations. no, really. fuck them. who cares if people are waiting for an update? nothing is stopping them from imagining what happens next, from reading other fics in the meantime, from writing their own. there is no rule that says "just because you want something, you should have it". there is beauty in the wanting stage! it's nice to want! just for the sake of it. that's called yearning, or tension, or foreplay, it's a crucial part of the pleasure. so, just bcs people want the next chapter, doesn't mean you need to give it to them now, or ever. you're writing this for yourself first and foremost, this is your story, your hobby, your passion. do it for you, anon. it's not selfish, i promise you.

if anyone ever makes you feel like you're disappointing them bcs you won't give them what they want exactly when they ask for it, i urge you to think of them as a needy brat. and you're the topdom Alpha writer who knows what they need better than they do. they will take what you give them and say "thank you", bcs you're in control here. there's nothing wrong with wanting! let them want! let them wait. you got this anon i believe in you<333