Good question, Anon.

Blondie because he's built like a shit brickhouse and probably rough. Bloke had eyebags and likely running on zero sleep, cocaine, and work stress. Glazing and tanning Alastor's butt is the medicine.

Second choice is Glasses Executive. Tallest. Likely charming and smooth in public. Total freak in bed. Uses Alastor to process his extra spicy internalised issues and train Alastor to bend over his desk with his daily coffee errand run. Teases Alastor for his vision problems, a hypocrite.