anon · 3d
HI HIIII! this is kind of personal so you don't have to answer, but i was wondering if the way that you view love/fall in love kind of connects with hyunjin's theme in pathology of attraction and case 143. there's this common theme i feel like I can really relate to with that sense of not feeling worthy enough to receive love, and i saw that written in such depth and common for hj that I was just wondering if you've experienced that a lot. please don't answer if it's too personal! love your works 🤍🤍🫂
hi sweet darling anonnnn!!! awh this is such a sweetly phrased question <3 tbh i write a lot of emotions i CAN'T relate to as 1) a fun excercise, 2) to make characters more varied, or 3) to achieve a dynamic that interests me!
that said!!
hyunjin is someone who I can project onto for multiple reasons. when it comes to romantic endeavors, as a rather unlucky person, I find comfort in giving him the happy ending I don't think I'll have, despite his having those insecurities. I'm not as, uh, pathologically obsessive as he is in Pathology, and I'm not convinced I'm a bad person the way he is in Case 143, but I am a deeply romantic person who is grappling with giving up on romance, so sometimes my hopelessness manifests as an internalized doubt about whether I am "worthy" or "deserving". I think that is the throughline you probably saw in his iterations of those two fics, even if they take on different flavors 😌 thank you so so much for your insight and for wording your question so sweetly ❤️ it also made me think about which of my personal traits I give to each of the 8 and that was such a fun excercise 🥰 there are bits of me in all of the versions I write, and then exogenous bits that I enjoy playing with too. writing fiction is such a silly fun interesting form of self-exploration too, isn't it?
