"Fight back," Jeonghan snarls. The knife pressed to Wonwoo's throat nicks the skin. "It's no fun if you let me win."

Wonwoo stares up at him wide eyed, fingernails digging into the thin skin of Jeonghan's wrist. Panic locks his bones into place, and acid burns the back of his mouth.

"Are you afraid?" he asks with a wild laugh. "I told you, after Sokcho. If I made it out alive, I'd kill you."

Sokcho? "I've never even been to—"

"Shhh," Jeonghan smirks, face dangling just inches from his own, close enough to kiss. His hair tickles Wonwoo's nose, sweat cutting through the peach spray that typically sticks to his skin.
That's comforting, despite. That's the same.

Wonwoo's observant in all of the ways except the more obvious. It took him years to notice the beauty mark near Jeonghan's eye. It took him seconds to notice the thin scar circumventing his face, concealed with hastily applied makeup.

Jeonghan's posture is wrong, the set of his mouth. On the inside of his wrist, a rose tattoo curls around and rests at the heel of his palm. Things he would know, find, press his mouth to.

Somehow, something about him is off.

Somehow, someone with his face and name has wronged him in ways that Wonwoo—here, now, bleeding from a split lip and stars in his eyes from the lack of oxygen—must now pay for.

He's always said that Jeonghan has every right to want to lay hands on him. Ending an engagement so soon after proposing is a bitch move. One they've never bounced back from.

"What the hell are you doing?" he manages out, trying and failing to peel back the vice grip Jeonghan has on his collar. "Are you trying to kill me?!"

Wonwoo sure as hell never thought he would follow through. The feral curl of his mouth, the threat in his gaze. Shit. Cold laughter sends a chill down his spine.

"Yes. We've gone over this before."

Jeonghan shifts his grip. The blunt edge digs near where his carotid artery should be. Maybe. It's hard to think with all of his internal sirens screaming danger. "Bringing you in alive just wouldn't be worth it."

"Bringing me in?" he echoes, almost stupid. What is happening here? One day, they're agreeing to be cordial again, exchanging the last of each other's things after the breakup and now—

"The agency has a pretty penny on your pretty little head." Agency? A hand smacks his cheek. "Just business."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

Jeonghan groans. "Don't you get tired of this?"

A leg swings over Wonwoo's chest, knee pinning him to the ground. Jeonghan's strength is startling. He can't move. The smirk on Jeonghan's face makes him want to spit venom, though the switchblade spinning in his hands keeps Wonwoo from fighting back.

Jeonghan catches his eyes flitting from the blade to his face, and he makes a cooing sound. Wonungie, whose baby are you? Wonwoo is helpless.

"Jeonghan-hyung." He's pleading. Hair prickles at the back of his neck. All of his senses are screaming danger.

"Please," he begs.

"Ah, honey." Jeonghan pats his cheek condescendingly. The knee on his sternum presses deeper, steel pressure against Wonwoo's ribcage. The tip of the blade cuts open one of the top buttons of his shirt. Then another. And another.

Plastic buttons tic-tic-tic-spin and settle on the linoleum floor. "It'll be fast. Promise."

Just gonna quote my comment on this fic:

the entire bar scene pulled something out of me that has been lying dormant at the back of my mind, but me aside, it’s that shift—feeling that it isn’t yours, that you’re just practice for someone else, more available, someone who could give the person you’re trying to not want anything—that mix of internalized homophobia and insecurity is heartbreaking (and also, my favorite flavor of jeonghan-driven martyrism).

It's just. such a very SPECIFIC kind of queer experience to see someone and all the ways you could hold them back by letting them love you. I've grazed over this in fics in the past but not the way that OP does in a way that makes you immediately seek out your "damn bitch did you even TRY to be happy today??" playlist. SO incredibly talented and an author to watch if you aren't already!!

Love a good secret relationship! I know in the past Inkigayo sandwiches were a thing (idols slipping each other their numbers) and I've seen people say that uh. Cars and hallways. Are a popular place for idols to hookup (good for them!!!).

Someone feel free to correct me on this also but the couples shirt/couple items have kind of been demystified for me after spending a month in Seoul. The number of times I saw a couple wearing matching shirts... that were buy one get one free at the mall about 5 minutes later was not zero. I don't doubt there are sweet intentions but it was one of those things that made me text the groupchat with "what is more romantic than a good deal"

I hesitate to answer this because it's double edged and I personally have a pretty conservative (meaning strict, limited) scope of what I will write or read in canon-setting RPF. There are writers who handle heavier subject matter like internalized homophobia, restrictive dieting, mental health, drug use and so on who exist in fandom already. None of those things are fun to think about or read about, especially when some of us have our own fraught relationships with our bodies so I would never say that people "should" write something. Especially if I myself am not willing to touch on it, but I do think that if you're considering idolverse in any K-RPF setting to consider the BBB-board. (Bleak Boyband Bingo is one of my favorite things anyone has done on this side of the internet - and there are squares relevant to girl groups as well!) https://x.com/bbb_fest/status/1193652264382038016)

On a more lighter note, I once heard about actors apartment swapping while working in location in each other's cities (ATL/LA) and that would be such a fun setup for a The Holiday AU.... but make it idolverse....

S. how do i feel about fanart for my fic?

i've commissioned fanart for my fics before and i would probably cry if someone made fanart. like won't even hold you bro i would send that artist an audio message of me snot crying

C. how did i come up with the title for [insert fic here]?

if you have a specific ask, i can probably think of it but most of the titles are song lyrics or from poems! you can find the title playlist here: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3x836N4WxYOOwR708Jd7aM

G. sequel for i know the sound

this is one of those fics where i have considered writing more in-universe, but i do feel like there is nowhere else for it to go. jokingly. i have talked about seungcheol being one of kyeomva's subscribers. i don't know who i would pair him with for that if i wrote it. maybe wonwoo. he has a Thing for Voices and wonwoo has a nice voice. maybe he's like. gotten so used to getting off to a voice that he has a Reaction to one of his buddies in his discord guild and it makes playing games with him so awkward and now he has a pavlovian reaction to a voice chat notification.

rly talking myself into this one damn. table this for later unless someone wants to take one for the team and write it for me

Q. do i like getting prompts from my readers?

Very genuinely I do enjoy when people are like "hey, I had this idea and I think you would be great at writing this" because people have! And it's nice to be thought of! Sometimes I will write the thing! But I'm not really interested in taking prompts outside of the occasional I post a prompt list and you send me a ship and a number type thing. Sorry!

V. comments that have stuck with me

One that I think about a lot is a commenter who told me that one of my fics helped them feel seen about not being able to get over a breakup long after everyone had told them they should be over it. At the time, I was feeling really down on myself for not being able to move past this one thing in my life even in fiction, but that... you know? It was nice. Sometimes, it's a nice reminder that those words aren't sent out to a void.

I don't think I could write a true sequel to closer because all I can think about when it comes to this fic is how much porn I was going to write but didn't because I was pissing myself off, so it would probably be set up in a "kink list"-style AU where they just. Go down a list of wants with each other. Starting mild with like. Spit kink and bondage and collaring, then getting up to [REDACTED] and [REDACTED] and [HEAVILY REDACTED]

On a much lighter note, I think that the relationship between Bora and Siyeon happening in the background would be a lot of fun to explore because they are also an August Leo/October Libra couple and when I tell you that Siyeon's post for Bora's bday over the weekend was...................something...................lesbians........

O. thoughts on fic of fic?

I'm open to it as long as you talk to me first! Or even if inspiration hit and you realized a little retroactively, just send me a message.

Overall, I think it's really fun and I'm running my second fic remix exchange right now, but this one is more ficmix inspired than a WIP exchange.

One day, I want to run a fest where friends and I build out an AU and we all write within that same universe but different pairings and POVs one day - I saw some fic writers do that years ago and thought that was so cool.

I'm in support of anything in fandom that is meant to create community and is based in returning to what fandom is: a gift economy.

X. how would I categorize my fic reading habits?

I read a lot less fic now than I have in the past, mostly because I'm writing a lot more, and I've gotten back into reading books. I would say that I'm picky because I can afford to be. There's things I don't read in RPF because my fictional fandom serves that purpose for me. I think compartmentalization is the right word? Because if I can't find it here, I can write it or find it somewhere else.

R. answered, but just generally speaking, reading more broadly makes you a better writer. August I think is Women in Translation month? Meant to showcase works by women who have been translated for a broader audience, and I highly recommend reading outside of your comfort zone and experiences.

I'm on my 34th book this year, with 48 being my TBR goal and best books I've read so far this year has been Gifted and Talented by Olivie Blake, Dayspring by Anthony Oliviera, I'll Love You Forever by Giaae Kwon, Big Fan by Alexandra Romanoff, Water Moon by Samantha Yambao, and Any Man by Amber Tamblyn. I try to go into books blind and create my own conclusions.

T. fic tropes i can't stand

I am the world's pickiest reader who will close the tab for literally any reason so this is not a fun question for me to answer nor is it a fun answer for people to read. Just. Know that I don't enjoy a lot of things and if you've never seen me rec it or write it, I'm probably not going to read it.

Z. is there a story you've written that hasn't gotten a lot of love?

You know. I wrote headaches & bad luck way before I had even heard about K-Pop Demon Hunters and DK and Jihyo are idols who are demon hunters in this fic. I would love to revisit this with the movie in mind.... I had a lot of lofty plans for this AU and one day, I'll get to them. https://archiveofourown.org/works/57042691